Bullying | It Gets Better

It's crazy to think that half of all children are bullied at some point during their school years and more than 10% of those are bullied regularly. I myself was bullied for many years and I can't begin to tell you how that has affected me but I want you to know that it does get better eventually. 

What is bullying?

Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behaviour that is repeated or has the potential to be repeated over time. It includes making threats, spreading rumours, attacking somebody verbally or physically, excluding somebody from a group on purpose among other things.

What are the different types of bullying?

Verbal bullying - name calling, being threatened, being made to feel bad

Physical bullying - being hit, punched, pushed, having items stolen or any other form of physical/aggressive contact

Social bullying - left out of games and left out of gatherings on purpose, being deliberately ignored, having rumours spread about you, being made to feel like an outsider

Cyber - bullied through chat rooms, instant messaging, through emails or via a mobile phone

How can I tell if somebody is being bullied?

- Individual becomes more quiet/sad/dejected

- Displays unexpected anger or frustration 

- Avoids sharing a certain topic

- Change in behaviour (more secretive)

- Unexplained injuries (cuts/bruises etc)

- Often losing things they take to school

- Skipping lessons or school altogether 

- Damaged clothes, books or possessions

People are bullied for a whole different manner of reasons. From their gender identity, culture, race or religion to their sexuality, disability, interests and their appearance. Surveys in schools (as of 2013) have shown that people are most likely to be bullied due to their appearance. 

Here are 10 facts for you to put into perspective how much of a serious subject bullying is.

1) Research has shown that 60% of boys who bullied others from aged 7 - 15 were convicted of at least one crime by the age of 24 and 40% had three more convictions by that age.

2) Academically gifted students, especially those with high verbal aptitude, are often bullied and more likely to suffer emotionally than 'less gifted' students

3) 1/10 students drop out of school due to being bullied

4) 57% of students who experience harassment in school never report it to a member of staff

5) Young people with disabilities or from sexual minorities are most at risk of bullying

6) Up to 69% of young people will experience bullying

7) Appearance and interests are found to be the biggest targets for playground taunts

8) 43% are verbally bullied frequently, 16% are physically bullied frequently and 21% are bullied online frequently

9) 16% said it has had a huge affect on their studies, 17% said it has had a huge impact their home lives, 30% said it has had a huge impact on their social lives, 38% said it has had a huge affect on their self esteem and 30% said it has reduced their optimism

10) 25% said that it has caused them to have suicidal thoughts, 24% have said it has caused them to self harm and 57% were not happy at all with the support available to them

Bullying isn't a joke and it certainly isn't a subject to be taken lightly. I know so many people who have been bullied who are struggling with them demons now after the bullying has stopped. The constant name calling and being made to feel like crap really does give your self confidence/self esteem a battering. 

Bullying affects every single aspect of your life. From your relationships with your family and friends to your school work. But I think it affects your self esteem the most. 
For me, I found it incredibly hard to function. I feared leaving my house and going to school, I was scared to go anywhere outside of my house by myself and I pushed everybody away from me. 

It can make you feel hurt, scared, worthless and lonely among other things, but always know that you aren't alone. If you (or somebody you know for that matter of fact) is being bullied, there are ways of stopping it. 

1) The most important thing for you to do is to tell somebody. Whether that's a parent, teacher or school counsellor. There is no way that you should have to deal with the bully alone.

2) Avoid the bully. Obviously you'll have to carry on with your normal routine in terms of school etc, but if you can avoid the situations where the bully typically picks on you, it will make a huge difference. For example: if he/she usually picks on you on the way home, change your route or get somebody to meet you/go with you.

3) Be brave. Even though you're probably feeling like absolute poo on the inside, show the bully that you don't care. If they think it hasn't had any affect on you, they'll most likely give up. Don't be emotional either. It's going to be hard, but if you feel like crying when they're being horrible just wait until you're alone or with a close friend before you have a little weep.

4) Don't fight back. Stooping to their level will give the bully exactly what they're looking for... a reaction. Stand your ground but don't be antagonistic.

5) Stay with friends. If you stick with a friend or a group of friends whenever you think you might bump into the bully they're less likely to target you. Safety in numbers and all that jazz! 

I can honestly tell you that it does get better eventually.

I've not been bullied for near enough two whole years now, purely down to the fact that I spoke up about it. 

I do occasionally get nasty messages via Tumblr but instead of responding to them I just delete them and try to take no notice. 

Some days are harder than others but as time goes on you'll feel so much better about life in general. 

I promise you.

Comment below if you found this post helpful somewhat.

I'd love to know your thoughts!